SITTING IN THE FIRE

In an authentic encounter with your BIG IMPOSSIBLE GOAL you will find yourself in the FIRE.

WE ARE IN THE FIRE whenever we challenge ourselves to have agency around our need to he heard, to change, to be appreciated, to connect and be safe.  In the FIRE is where we encounter shame, anger, rage and the nagging sense that we do not belong. It is in the FIRE that we evolve new capacities to hold with grace and compassion the dilemmas of being human.

The following elemental Journey is offered to support us, as we take BOLD MOVES that align with our B.I.G. Note that it is offered as a practice, so it can be repeated. It uses BLOOM’s P.L.A.Y.Y. framework to guide us, as we encounter the FIRE.

THE INTENTION

As you move through this process do so with the following intention

 “Today may I hold my life with grace, even as I am being held.”

THE JOURNEY

First….

IDENTIFY A PLACE IN YOUR LIFE WHERE YOU WOULD SAY YOU ARE IN THE FIRE. ALTERNATIVELY MAKE A BOLD MOVE IN THE DIRECTION OF YOUR B.I.G. THAT PUTS YOU IN THE FIRE.  

Then move through the following steps…

MINERAL

• P = PAUSE to REMEMBER as you so so to NOTICE any experience “separation” or not belonging that arises. This might be experienced as the thoughts — “I am being heard, I am misunderstood/ I am not in control/ I am not seen/ I am not as good as…/ I am abandoned, betrayed or I am not safe.”  Note any accompanying feelings of confusion about what’s going on, disorientation, distraction, procrastination, embarrassment at the thought of what is happening or might happen, a feeling of unworthiness, fraudulence, loneliness, or vulnerability. When you are ready, choose to FORGET what you have noticed, and remember the "land of your VISION --- the world that you are here to re-present for everyone.

NATURE

• L = LEAN IN an be CURIOUS about any tendencies that are triggered to engage in any of the following “triggered behaviors” (defensive strategies) : positive self talk to make things feel better; negative self talk about yourself and others; procrastination (waiting for certainty) or getting busy, hiding or explaining or justifying, letting go of people who challenge you, or asking for approval, running away or fighting with others. NOTICE how you might choose to cope with the experience of not belonging and shame. How do you cope? Do you overeat, try to have sex, masturbate, take a pill, smoke a blunt…? SIMPLY NOTICE THESE TENDENCIES, and LEAN into them/ follow them to their root. Notice any experience of feeling LOST or disoriented. Choose to be LOST.

FIRE

• A =. APPRECIATE your INTENTION. Ask yourself—“What is my intention?” What do I really want? What do I desire? What’s driving me? Is it to be heard, to be allowed to change; to be seen and valued; to feel connected—that I am felt; to be safe? Take a moment to honor your intention, your essential goodness. Notice that these intentions are shared by the others around you. Can you see this intention at work beneath your own actions and the actions of others? Choose to SEE without naming-- notice and release any judgments.

WATER

• Y = YES—LET GO. Identify and then let go of any EMOTIONS that might have been triggered by your stepping out. NOTICE the sensation of these emotions in your body. Do you feel any burning, overwhelming flooding, tensing, numbing in parts of your body? Can you LET THEM—be them as you observe how they might change, without judgment of wanting them to be other than they are. From the inside make room for them to be integrated. Choose to LET GO. 

EARTH

• Y = YES—ALLOW.  Allow yourself to BE HELD. HOLD all that is arising in your awareness, with equanimity. Imagine that you can offer yourself nurturance and nourishment just as you are. Can you allow yourself to be HELD and WELCOMED, just as you are? As you do this, can you notice any new doors to larger spaces for insight or action that are opening as you do this? Choose to BE

Repeat this process as often as you become aware that you are in the FIRE. 

“Today may I hold my life with grace, even as I am being held.”

ADDITIONAL READING

BLOOM ~ The Essential Journey

"Radical Acceptance" ~ Tara Brach

"Gifts of Imperfection" ~ Brene Brown