THE SUPER POWER CONVERSATION - How To Hold Each Other Lovingly Accountable
In this blog post, BLOOM founder Olubode introduces five questions we can ask each other that are meant to inspire awareness of our natural powers-- to center, inspire and celebrate them.
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Recently, in a group that I am part of, one of the members asked, “How do we hold each other lovingly accountable?” I have seldom heard the questions asked so purely. Accountability is something that we tend to approach with horror – a sense that somehow we will be embarrassed and shamed in the process. But this question was asked in a small group of men who really love each other, so it sat differently, and took me into a space of wondering.
This is my thoughtful response.
There is already known ways to help to hold each other accountable for the goals and intentions that we have spoken.
They include:
— Reminding each other of what we said,
— Asking how the progress is going?
— Inquiring into what has been accomplished and what has not
— Asking what is being felt and what support is needed
— Asking: What are the next steps?
A Regular Practice
It also helps if it is done regularly and with intention to support each other in moving forward.
Between Peers
And this kind of conversation when engaged in lovingly can be very helpful, especially when it is between two people or within a group who are “holding each other accountable,” as in an accountability partnership. In such a partnership there is mutuality– the group operates in equity.
Essentially these types of conversations are one where each person accounts for the bits and pieces of a project, some of which have materialized and others of which are in process or have not.
The Superpower Conversation
Recently, I have discovered yet another layer of conversation that can also be had, that goes beyond the counting of bits and pieces and also invites each person engaged in the conversation into a reflection on the use of their power.
Before I share the framework for this conversation I will first share my observation on the nature of what’s called a “project,” as they are usually the focus of accountability conversations. There tends to be something to be accomplished or materialized.
Projects — the things we desire to manifest are best thought of as projections that are coming through us, that are rooted in our primordial desire to be. These projects I think are better called “projections.” They are not personal.
The second thing to note is that they are co-creations, we as embodied multidimensional beings get to participate with their manifestation, consciously.
We can block them when we are not aware of the process by which they manifest through us. When we are aware that they are manifesting through a channel that is us, we gradually become aware of how this channel might operate.
Our Superpowers
I have observed through my own experience and study that such projections are activated by the following 5 abilities or natural powers that we have.
They are our ability to:
- Pause and Remember ourselves and our nature– put together stories and create new meaning from our experiences that help us to make better sense of our journey.
- Be curious by leaning in and experiencing uncertainty – to embody experiences that are new and take us into new thrilling territory.
- Imagine, to visualize what’s happening and an outcome– to see the best in things and others and create beauty from the best essences of things.
- Change perspective, to let go and see or connect to things from different points of view.
- Use our intuition, to allow / welcome everything, yet notice the gaps between phenomena and go there.
I think of these as our superpowers.
These are the things that I believe children do naturally.
At BLOOM these abilities are seen as inner parallels of the five physical senses, and are also thought of as expressions of the five elements of creation as are our five physical senses.
With this foundation laid, given that we each have these abilities, what can another conversation for accountability be about the way that we use these super powers be.
The following are a set of five questions that might be helpful to ask each other as we accompany each other as we each manifest the desires that are us. These questions are based on the idea that we are each POWERFUL, that have what we need now to accomplish the things we dream about. They are meant to inspire awareness of our abilities and to center, inspire and celebrate them.
The Questions
Each week, with a partner or group of your choosing explore the following questions together:
GIVEN YOUR PURPOSE / PROJECT ...
- … as you PAUSE, what are you REMEMBERING about why you are doing what you do? Why is it needed now, and why are you the one to accomplish it?
- ….as you LEAN-IN, what are you now curious about? What are you now exploring, valuing and embodying in yourself?
- … as you APPRECIATE more and more of what you have, what is it that you can imagine creating with the value you have and the value you can see in others?
- …as you say YES to life, who or what have you noticed that you have been grasping for, or holding on to that you can now LET GO OFF and see differently.
- …as you say YES to life, what BOLD MOVES are you taking now or intend to take? … What can you now ALLOW? What can you sense or intuit as your next move? What are the synchronicities that you are noticing and following-up on?
One of the things I have enjoyed in my work with groups of people who are choosing to live purposefully is the way individuals have supported each other. I am excited at the growing possibility of a network of people who intentionally support each other’s purpose.
I have offered these questions to such groups as a framework to empower our support for each other ongoingly. I recommend them as a way to support, inspire and celebrate each other each time you check-in with each other.
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ABOUT OLUBODE
Olubode is hired by organizational leaders, transitioning professionals and creative entrepreneurs to help them as they think through the complexities of their lives, businesses and enterprises. He is the author of two books on Well-Being, Life-Purpose and Balance: BLOOM The Essential Journey- A New Guide to Balance Growth & Well-Being and FINDING YOUR B.I.G. - Finding New Purpose In Changing Times. In them he introduces a new way of thinking and asking fundamental questions based on the five elements that grow and balance life. This body of thought is called “The Philosophy of BLOOMING.”
He is currently the thought leader in residence at the AWO HUB, a Global Collective of Creatives based in Accra, Ghana.His work is focused on working with diverse leaders who are thinking collectively, working cooperatively, and acting globally in the fields of Well-Being & Mental Health, Social Justice, Economic Empowerment, Equity and Community Development.
More here:
https://www.bloomeducation.institute/bloom
